Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Register This

On Sunday, mAc and I registered for wedding presents. After the scanning is done and the lists have been made, I can officially say--I am Greed's bitch.

We went into this process extremely pragmatically. We've been living together for over 5 years, and even though we've hung on to a number of crappy things from college/early 20's, we've still amassed a lot. We don't need much. So we decided to only add things to the registry that we either didn't have, needed to replace, or just really, really wanted.

First up, dishes & flatware. Absolutely necessary. Then came the combo grill/griddle with removable, dishwasher-safe plates. Oh, yeah. See ya Forman! Then... well. Then shit started to get out of control...

Do we really need a special ladle for pancake batter? No. Is it super-cute and reasonably priced? Yup. Scan it.
Do we have a grill? Nope. But we should probably get a long, suede grilling mitt in a sassy color anyway for when we do. I'm not sure what I was thinking with the blue flowery tea-light holders, except that they were cute and it was really easy to picture them on the windowsill of a bathroom that we don't have yet.
Ditto the small vase with the dragonfly etched in it. The hell? I don't know. Finally, we rarely make soup that doesn't go directly from the can to the bowl to the microwave. So I'm not sure what's going on here.
If we get it, I promise to throw a dinner party featuring some kind of french onion affair.

So, yeah. It's ridiculous, but damn, was it fun. I won't lie. I actually really want that pancake batter ladle AND the matching super-wide pancake-flipping spatula that goes with it.

I just can't help feeling greedy and guilty. "But you're getting MARRIED." I know, and believe me, I am thrilled about that and agree that it's worth celebrating. But it's completely unfair that we should get so much on our special day, yet some of my favorite couples in this country can't.

You know who I'm talking about. I'm talking about Mike & David, who've been together FOREVER and have the rings, the house, the dogs, and the happiness, but no tax benefits, no legal recognition--no registry. Same goes for Joel and Todd, Kate and Monique, and Jennie and Tracey. The list goes on. It's unfair and it sucks.

I'll tell you another thing: it's economically retarded. You want to stimulate the economy? Let those boys in WeHo start having weddings. First of all, I know at least 5 guys who think that having a "beer & wine" bar at a reception is cheap and tacky--it's full bar or they aren't coming. (Good thing they're not invited to ours. *ahem*) Second, Mike & David? Are 38 and 43, respectively. You know they aren't registering at Target. Helloooo Barney's! Now factor in the new demand for Armani tuxedos, Tiffany favors and Spago appetizers, and what? What was that boom? Oh, it's the economy! Hurrah! Red pancake-batter ladles for everyone!



dothatgirl said...

We got a soup tureen, for which we registered, as a wedding gift. It is beautiful and I have used it at two dinner parties - corn chowder at Christmas and tortilla soup last week. I was advised by my guests, however, not to be a slave to my wedding presents. Duly noted.

brk said...

thank god you didn't make mention of mark and me.

Dinah said...

Ha! I almost did, just in case you were reading.